Wednesday’s Child finds ‘forever homes’ (with audio)
Crystal and Eddie Walsh of Mountain Home have seven horses, two dogs, six cats, two pigs, one cow, 18 chickens - and nine children. Seven of the Walsh children are adopted, two from Wednesday’s Child. One is a foster child and one - the most recent addition - is Crystal and Eddie’s biological child. They all live in a five-bedroom, three-bath farmhouse. “We could never have children of our own - then came William,” Crystal said, laughing.The Walshes are an anomaly. Few people want to adopt so many children. Today, more than 500,000 U.S. children wait in foster care for a “forever home.” In Idaho, the number of children placed in foster care increased from 747 in 1993 to 3,335 in 2006. To help those kids find families, and vice versa, the Idaho Department of Health and Welfare works with Special Needs Adoptive Parent Services Inc., a charitable nonprofit corporation that sponsors the Wednesday’s Child program, which attempts to find parents and permanent homes for the children in the program. The mostly adopted Walsh kids are like stairsteps: Tia, 17, Natosha, 16, Morgan, 15, Tyler, 11, Chantelle, 10, Jenny, 9, Nicole, 8, Alexis, 6, and William, 16 months. Their family began to grow after Eddie joined the Air Force and was stationed in Great Britain. “We went to world-renowned fertility doctors in England and they said ‘no,’ ” Crystal said.They looked into adoption.”I thought, I’ll just be a mom for other people’s children,” Crystal said. “Eddie only wanted two. I wanted six because I grew up with the Brady Bunch and the Waltons - now I get to live it,” Crystal said. “I keep thinking we’ll go for a baker’s dozen.”They adopted siblings Tyler and Chantelle in England. After moving back to the States, they added the others. Three of the children are developmentally disabled. Two are biological siblings who were featured in the Wednesday’s Child program: fiercely loyal but shy Natosha and outgoing Morgan came as a package deal, like many of the children adopted through Wednesday’s Child. WHAT IS WEDNESDAY’S CHILD?Wednesday’s Child uses television and newspapers to help find families for special needs children who have been removed from their birth parents. Special needs can mean anything from siblings who need to stay together to kids who have shaken baby syndrome, ADHD or fetal alcohol syndrome.The birth parents’ rights may have been terminated for reasons including mental illness, physical or sexual abuse, substance abuse or neglect, or the child may have been in imminent danger. Substance abuse is the biggest contributor to the termination of parental rights, according to Kathy McCarroll, the program specialist for the Idaho Department of Health and Welfare, who oversees the contract with the Wednesday’s Child program.While there are no hard statistics, methamphetamine probably results in termination of parental rights more than anything, said Marti Wiser, director of Idaho Wednesday’s Child. It’s hard finding a new family for any child, Wiser said. For children with special needs, finding a forever home can be even more difficult. That’s where Wednesday’s Child helps. The program can give a child more exposure and more of a chance at getting a new home. The program works with the child, his or her adoption team, the media - and sometimes possible parents.Wednesday’s Child programs sprouted up across the country in the early 1990s. In Idaho, television station KIFI Channel 8 in Idaho Falls started airing Wednesday’s Child segments hosted by news anchor Jay Hildebrandt in 1985. It launched locally in 1998 on KTVB Channel 7, with segments hosted by news anchor Dee Sarton. Since then, several newspapers, including the Idaho Statesman, have been running it as a weekly feature.And it works. From June 2006 to June 2007, about 40 children from the program were placed in pre-adoptive homes. The adoption rate for children in the Wednesday’s Child program is 75 percent, Wiser said. Wiser writes the children’s profiles you can see on the Web site, keeping them candid without breaching privacy. She doesn’t like to present a sad story.”We need to see them not as victims but as resilient young people who, given the right environment, patience and understanding will be able to overcome those challenges,” she said. How long does it take to find a match? For most, from 14 weeks to over a year. For one boy, it took two years.”It amazes me some of the families who come forward. I used to catch myself thinking, ‘I don’t think I’m going to be able to find a family for this child.’ But I never think that anymore,” Wiser said. “It renews my faith in the human race.”Even so, Wiser said, older children, especially boys between 14 and 17, have a harder time finding an adoptive home. “They always want to know how long it’s going to take,” Wiser said. “It’s not their fault. They didn’t do anything wrong. There’s just that perception out there, that teenage girls are easier to raise.” Heartstring tugs are her main job hazard, Wiser said. “My husband and I have an empty nest. We’ve been married 36 years, and every time I approach my husband about adopting one of the children, he says, ‘Are you going to quit your job? Marti, you can help one child or you can help many.’ “MEET VINCENTVincent is a shy, soft-spoken 8-year-old with dark hair, freckles and a Dennis the Menace smile. He loves football and chocolate waffles. He has a little hearing loss, but not much, and he speaks with a slight - and adorable - lisp. Vincent is a Wednesday’s Child. He will be featured on Channel 7’s weekly segment, in newspaper profiles and on the Web. On the day of his big interview with Channel 7 news anchor Dee Sarton, Vincent gets the day off from school to go first to Boondocks, then the park to play flag football.Confusion and excitement dance across his face. “We like to take the kids somewhere fun,” Wiser says, “so they can relax before the interview. We ask them what they would like to do, where they would like to go.”At Boondocks, Vincent is finger-tapping nervous. Sheila Knezevich, Vincent’s caseworker, says he thought this was his last morning with his foster family. He’s fond of them and was worried he would never see them again.After she tells him he can return to them later that day, Vincent relaxes a bit and plays video games, spending his winning tickets on gifts for his two foster sisters. But he hardly touches his pizza. “I’m not really that hungry,” he says. “Are we ready to go, can we go now?”At the park, Vincent takes our pictures with his camera. He’s interested in photography. “I collect cameras.” He says he likes Spiderman movies, riding his bike (but not right now, it has two flat tires), roller-skating (but he doesn’t have skates) and math - sometimes.He meets Sarton, who has been the interviewer since KTVB started airing Wednesday’s Child. With the camera rolling, she sits in the grass and talks to Vincent about football and the family he’s hoping for. He shouts the name of his favorite football team - “Go Broncos!” and says he would like to live with a football-loving family. One with pets - cats and dogs - and a brother and sister.”We call her the child whisperer,” Wiser says. “She’s always so good with the kids.”Afterward, Vincent asks us all to play flag football with him. Wiser brought flags in his favorite colors, Bronco blue and orange. How can we resist? We divide up into teams, the boys against the girls.The boys win. Vincent grins.As of press time, Vincent was without a new family, although 24 people or families have expressed an interest and several home studies are in the works, Knezevich says. “I just haven’t seen the perfect match yet.”THE WALSHES MAKE IT WORKWednesday’s Child adoptees Natosha and Morgan have settled into life with the Walshes. They do their chores and help care for their brothers and sisters. They like to ride horses. Morgan’s work with King, a retired racehorse, won her a fancy belt buckle from the Optimist Ag group for showmanship. During the summer, she was a lifeguard. “I saved four people this year,” she said.Their lives have changed dramatically in the span of a few years. “We lived in seven foster homes before we were adopted,” Morgan said. Their profiles were featured on the Wednesday’s Child Web site and, before coming to the Walsh family, they had been in another adoptive home, but the adoption fell through.”Morgan and ‘Tosha came in the middle of the night,” said Crystal Walsh. The girls were 13 and 12, and they brought all of their belongings with them in a black trash bag.”I hate it when foster kids have to move and they use a black trash bag. I hate it. It’s just degrading. I wouldn’t move my dog like that,” Crystal said.She works as a parent training volunteer for Pride (Parent Resources for Information, Development and Education) and helps raise money to buy high chairs, cribs, strollers, car seats - and luggage - for foster families. She keeps the items in a warehouse and ready for emergency calls in the middle of the night. And she and Eddie take in foster children when needed.”When we first started fostering, my husband wasn’t sure he could adopt other people’s children,” she said. “But when we had to pass our first foster child on, my husband bawled like a baby.”What our job is, is parents sometimes lose their way. We’re there to help the kids manage their way while their parents try to find their way back. That’s our privilege,” she said. “It’s not what you leave this world with, it’s what you leave behind.”Unlike many Wednesday’s Child adoptions, Tosha and Morgan have kept in touch with their biological family, including their grandparents and their mom. Crystal said the girls had a hard time calling her “mom” when they first arrived.”Not that I am their mom, but I am the mom of the house,” Crystal said. “And I have a piece of paper that says I am their mother.”She said right after the adoption, the girls called their biological grandparents. “We asked them, ‘Why did you feel the need?’” Crystal said, “They said, ‘We just wanted to tell them we’re OK now.’ They had finally reached their destination and just wanted to tell them.” Morgan said at first she was embarrassed to tell friends she was adopted. “Now I tell everybody,” she said. “Everybody at school knows. When you’re adopted, you’re chosen. You’re special. “In foster homes, they just take care of you. When you’re adopted, it’s your permanent home.”"Your forever home,” Crystal said.”People love you and they’re there for you,” Morgan said, smiling across the room at her family. Jeanne Huff: 377-6483
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